Garage sale life

You know those yard sales where someone’s trying to convince you to buy a table with three legs, a jacket with no lining, and a great cassette collection though you have no cassette player?

Well, I’m the neighbor who keeps all that stuff in the house because it’s just embarrassing to drag it out to the lawn.

You might remember almost two years ago an adorable and indignant Peanut ruined my car stereo. It’s been hit or miss each time we’re in the car—sometimes we hear CDs or NPR and sometimes the speakers just won’t work thanks to the quarter still lodged somewhere in the CD player’s nether regions.

I’m getting fed up, though, There were weeks we heard 90% of what we wanted to. It’s now down to 25%, even with the trick Spouse devised where we Fonzie the passenger side of the dash to jiggle the quarter out of whatever contact points are blocked.

And you know what? “Wait, Wait Don’t Tell Me” is nothing if you hear only 25%. “This American Life” is useless if you hear one sentence out of four. And, most important, “Science Friday” might as well be “Science Monthly” since we hear almost none of it.

Bah humbug.

(btw, spell check allows Fonzie but not CDs. Proof the coders are over 40. Or knows more pop culture than punctuation rules.)

4 thoughts on “Garage sale life

  1. I love “Wait, Wait, Don’t Tell Me.” And I think I’d be foaming at the mouth in rage if I could only hear about a quarter of it. That’s suckage. Would it help for you to know that we don’t own anything nice, either?

  2. My in law’s revenge for my husband was to have him drive the POS car when he was dating me. You would turn the wheel to steer and the radio station would change. There was a fire extinguisher in the car, under the glove compartment, due to a fire that occurred with children in the car…At least, there is no fire extinguisher, alas, there is no entertainment either for you. Hoping for a miracle!

  3. Evenshine, I don’t know, but it seems that if Fonzie went by The Fonz, I’m wont to coin “to Fonze” as the verb. Fonzify? Your choice. We need to be able to conjugate it: I fonze, you fonze, she fonzes. I fonzed, I will fonze, I have fonzed.

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