calling all knock knock jokes

I need some good jokes for keeping the six-year-old entertained at the dinner table.

Our current fave:

Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Panther.
Panther who?
Panther no panth, I’m goin’ thwimmin’.

(Credit to a three-year-old friend circa 2000.)

Your turn. Hit me with your best joke.

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26 thoughts on “calling all knock knock jokes

  1. Knock Knock.
    Who’s there?
    Peas.
    Peas Who?
    Peas on earth.
    and then my youngest one says the joke over and over again with every different vegetable and fruit and laughs like crazy

    Why did the lettuce blush? Because she saw the salad dressing.

  2. knock knock.
    who’s there?
    banana.
    banana who?
    knock knock.
    who’s there?
    banana.
    BANANA WHO?
    knock knock.
    who’s there?
    orange.
    orange who?
    orange you glad I didn’t say “banana”?

  3. this one’s for you, it has vegetables in it….
    “This lady had green tomatoes in her garden, and her neighbor had bright, ripe tomatoes in her garden, so one day she asked her neighbor how she got her red tomatoes. “well, she said, “i wait for the full moon, then i go out into the garden and take off all my clothes and dance in front of the tomatoes. they get embarrassed, and turn red.” so the neighbor did the same thing. next morning the neighbor asked how her tomatoes were. “well.” she said, “my tomatoes are still green but my cucumbers grew three inches.”

    these are for the kids:
    knock knock
    who’s there?
    olive
    olive who?
    olive (i love) you soooo much

    knock knock
    who’s there?
    anita
    anita who?
    anita (i need a) bath!!!

  4. Knock Knock
    Who’s there?
    Boo!
    Boo hoo?
    Why you crying Mommy?

    Knock Knock
    Whos there?
    Nana
    Nana who?
    Na Na Boo Boo!

    My fave that my 3 year old came up all on her own. After I told her the Banana, banana, Orange joke I started with another:

    Me: Knock Knock
    3YO: No one’s home!

    • Mad woman, your 3yo is awesome. When I do banana, banana, banana, orange you glad, my 6yo always says, “No.” He wants it to keep going. Ugh.

  5. I forgot this one my kids like too:
    Knock, Knock.
    Who’s there?
    Impatient Cow
    The person starts to say Impatient….
    and the joke-teller interrupts with ..Mooooooo
    (Not quite the same effect when writing it!)

  6. You took all my knock-knock jokes..but…my Kindergartener told me one that I LOVED:

    April showers bring May flowers. What do May flowers bring? Pilgrims!!!

  7. Knock knock.
    Who’s there?
    Tuba.
    Tuba who?
    Tuba toothpaste.

    Surely there are hundreds more stuck somewhere in my gray matter, but this late at night, that’s the only one that shakes loose.

  8. Knock knock.
    Who’s there?
    Who.
    Who who?
    Christine, come here. There’s an owl in the dining room!

    • The only thing that could make that better is if the other John Hughes was still alive. And sending me knock knock jokes on my blog. *sigh* I miss John Hughes.

      Good owl joke, though. Thanks!

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