For your amusement, I present this year’s holiday gathering invitation. Feel free to appropriate.
Holiday Apathy Festival of Meh
We’re having our first annual Holiday Apathy Gathering and you’re invited. But don’t let that unnerve you.
In this season of exceedingly high expectations, pressure, and stress, we’d like to nurture an afternoon of minimal effort. So we’re offering you several hours of eating snacks from bags and talking. Or not. Your call.
We won’t cook or clean or decorate. You don’t have to bring anything or plan anything. We don’t even expect you to shower.
If you know some bagged or boxed snack that gives you joy this time of year, you can bring it. But we don’t expect you to.
If you feel the need to prepare food to share, that’s on you. We don’t expect others to share our apathy, so we’ll be pleased to have you even if you’re one of those compulsive, homemade-pie-crust making types. Do what feels right for you. Everybody else wants a piece of you this season and we just want to see you get through intact. We’ll take you as you are. Unwashed, crafty, witty, slovenly, or passionately pro-holiday.
We offer you this December afternoon as a way to say, “Hey, we’re glad you’re alive. But we don’t want to bake any more this year and we’re tired of hiding all our crap just to have people over.”
Join us in our minimal efforts, won’t you?
Most of the Naptime Family.
Peanut doesn’t want anyone to come, which we honor by placing it in the official record.