The unshowered mother of a newborn

When you’re home with your first baby and unshowered for three days, nobody much minds.

When you’re taking the older one to school and you’re unshowered for three days, it’s kind of embarrassing.

When one of the preschool families brings in their pet boa constrictor and mentions its poor sight and reliance on smell, being unshowered for three days in the summer might be European in the Greek-economy way rather than the endearingly-French kind of way.

[Seriously, they said, “no, she doesn’t try to constrict us, but we try not to smell like chickens.” I asked about goats, because that is the farm animal I most resemble olfactorily.]

5 thoughts on “The unshowered mother of a newborn

  1. NAPTIME! Forgive me for laughing at you on this one, but that is so funny! There is nothing worse than being caught smelling like a goat.

    (A close second – When I tried to hush the 5YO who was making a public scene and she announced that my breath smelled like poop. So what I forgot to grab some gum after I finished my coffee?)

  2. Now see, if there were a snake in the preschool class, I would have made my way to the exit, even if I smelled like freshness itself.

    But yeah — I get it. With #2 you have less leeway on the hygiene. I’m glad hubby doesn’t have a hard and fast time that he has to be at work. I frequently keep him around another 15-30 minutes so I can remove my stink.

  3. Maria, is it wrong that I was more embarrassed than afraid for my life?
    ck, now you know why I’ve been calling you poopy breath for years.
    Fie, I envy you. Spouse can linger maybe one a.m. a week, so that day plus weekend makes for long in-between stretches of goatiness.

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