The Loh Down on Divorce

Sandra Tsing Loh, whose writing I admire and whose voice is all too often in my car, is ending her marriage of 20 years. And she has some intensely interesting things to say about women, marriage, and American culture.

Check out her intriguing article over at The Atlantic.

Made me thing of Orenstein’s book Flux, and of several conversations I’ve had lately with friends about limited hours in the day and priorities. Consider, for instance, her argument that “To a certain extent, men today may have more clarity about what it takes to raise children in the modern age. They don’t, for instance, have today’s working mother’s ambivalence and emotional stickiness.”

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2 thoughts on “The Loh Down on Divorce

  1. Oh, crap, naptime, what do I write? I don’t really agree wholey with the article. I think it generalizes. Unfortunately in my experience, I haven’t met a lot of good husband and dads because most of the guys my age I know aren’t married yet and most of the guys my husband’s age have Issues. While reading on the internet, I hear about these great dads and fathers, I think that there are a lot of men who fall worse than their own fathers. These men remember how their fathers worked outside the home and their mothers worked inside the home, which is what these men expect. Except these men now hire people to do work around the house that their fathers did. So now instead of both spouses working Saturday morning on chores, the husband drinks beer and watches tv while the wife does the same thing wives always do. Now that women take on so much, there is no wonder why so many women are frustrated. It always pissed me off that it is the woman’s responsiblity to “fix” the relationship, to heat up the bedroom. Well, hell after working since the time the kid got up, I think that he can do some work too because it takes two.

    Ok, so I did figure out something to say.

  2. Loh makes a similar point, faemom, when she says that you don’t see men’s magazines offering articles on how to fix, or even work on, your marriage.

    double standards abound. And your comment makes me think of the recent Dana Perino quote where she says that the political sex scandals aren’t limited to party, but to the Y chromosome. Vote for women, she says, because they’re too busy to screw around, professionally or sexually.

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