Oh, no. You did not.

One pound of sugar a week.

Eight ounces of salt a week.

Five hours of Skype a day.

Three exclamations pronouncing American weirdness each day.

All of these I take in stride from our new housemate. Even though those numbers only represent the few hours she’s here at home. Heaven knows how much sugar and salt her employer is having to buy this summer.

But when our adopted friend from the Dominican Republic found the best parts of Say Anything outrageously funny, I had to draw the line.

Some cultural differences are simply unacceptable.

Now I refuse to show her Office Space. I don’t think she deserves it.

Instead I’m letting her watch The Wedding Planner. It’s the closest thing to torture I think I.C.E. will allow in our situation.

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12 thoughts on “Oh, no. You did not.

    • Only about I.C.E. allowing The Wedding Planner. That’s torture under Article 790 of the Geneva Convention.

      The rest is, I swear to all that is subject to snark and sarcasm, actually and factually true.

    • The culture shock was preassumed to be cost- and transportation-related. But she is just flabbergasted that we eat whole grains and season with spices instead of salt. Simply gobsmacked.

  1. Is she getting paid for this job she’s doing? She can always feel free to buy her own crappy processed food, right? (Or will you not allow it in your house?)

    Have you started a countdown yet? Every time I read of post of yours about this, I am happier and happier that I ignored that email asking professors to host exchange students… :)

    • Fie, I’ve been thinking about those emails…I’m glad you ignored them, too.
      She’s paying for food here, and she has been having a lot of ketchup-on-white-bread sandwiches. She’s welcome to them. White bread is cheaper than the stuff we buy, and we’ve had the same bottle of organic ketchup for two years.

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